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Another Mother’s Day With One Missing & One on the Way (PAL Journal: 19 Weeks)

5/15/17

End of the 19th week! Officially half way there. Minus a few panic attacks here and there worrying over movement (or lack of), I did pretty well this week. Remember, Owen was always an active baby until the day he stopped, so I have no choice but to obsess over every movement his brother makes and hope I don’t miss a change at some point. So this period before babies have a set pattern is so hard for me!

We celebrated our first Mother’s Day with Jax in my belly going to church, having lunch at Portos (bringing home lots of yummy pastries for later too) and visiting Owen’s graveside.

It was a very emotional day, obviously I was happy to be expecting Jax, but I was well aware that his big brother was missing. I’m just so heartbroken still and maybe even more so knowing that Jax will be growing up without his brother, as Naomi is. But knowing Jax is on the way is very exciting and I’m feeling hopeful even though I’m still worried not knowing what happened with Owen. I know God can do all things, so I can’t wait to see the miracle He has in store for us.