Feeling like this bump is bigger than my other pregnancies at this point. A lot fuller higher up and pretty round. I feel lots of kicks mostly in the morning, after lunch and when I lay down at night. Jax is an active little boy. I love feeling him and seeing how he reacts to our voices.
6/20/17
The 24th week started off great as I was excited to be at the first viability milestone. We went to our OB apt. and then had an excruciatingly long ultrasound during which my OB was quiet, as usual, so I was praying so hard for God to please make Jax be perfect still as I gripped Josh’s hand. All these scary thoughts circling in my head made me feel like I was going to have a panic attack! I could feel my heart beating outside my chest. Thankfully at the end we asked if everything was still fine and our OB said Jax was ok. There was an area he was measuring over and over in the brain but he said that space was still within normal limits. I started to cry after, mostly from relief but also worry.
I asked if we could start the NST’s early to begin monitoring our baby’s heart. He said that we could if it would make me feel better and suggested 30 weeks, but I asked for 28, since we lost our son, Owen, at 32 and I wanted to have a little more reassurance that everything was okay with Jax.
So proud of my little grad! She did so well, even with mommy stuck on bedrest. She’s so resilient. Her teacher was so sweet.
Naomi was so happy mommy could come to her graduation. I wouldn’t miss it for the world, but I had to beg to be allowed off bedrest. It’s always a balance of risk vs. how critical something was to do & this for me was a must.
The rest of the week was nice, getting dropped off at Naomi’s school to watch her graduate and having a relaxing Father’s Day weekend at home. I gave daddy a shirt that said Big Man and a Little Man onesie. I pray Jax and Josh get to wear them together some day. It’s been a bumpy ride and though we are still worried we have faith Jax will make it.
Read for our Little Man. Naomi thought this set was so cute too. We can’t wait to hopefully get to see her littlest brother and daddy in their matching set.
Josh and I were both saying how we just didn’t picture Owen coming home (such a strange premonition), but we do see Jax here. So hopefully this is God’s plan for us now and we can experience the joy of having our second son home with us. He is not a replacement for Owen, but we have been dreaming of the day we could give Naomi a living sibling to grow up with and both of us have been so eager to raise a son, it would be wonderful for all of us if this wish comes true this time.
First thing about this week is that I finally left the house (for something other than a doctor apt.) to go see Naomi’s classwork at her kindergarten Open House. I knew it was as important to her as it was to me that I go too even though Josh thought I shouldn’t, or should ask the doctor. But I knew it would be quick, though when we got home I ate on the couch to rest and felt exhausted so I went to bed right after.
This week was also my birthday, which turned out to be a special one. I didn’t want Josh to invite guests over because I would have to lay there and it just seemed stressful to have him plan something for me. I’m going to see all my friends soon for Jax’s Sprinkle so I didn’t want anything crazy. But I still had several sweet friends pop by to visit who brought dinner, flowers, cakes and gifts. I asked the neighbors to come join us for cake last minute too since we had so much (plus the Sprinkles red velvet cupcakes Josh brought home the day before). He got me a pretty blue orchid, Owen’s color, and I asked my mom to take Naomi to the dollar store to let her pick out a gift for me (crossword puzzle books, good for bedrest, and a cute little blinged out hand mirror). She’s always so proud to give us gifts and I love everything she’s ever picked out for me. I wear the Your Are My Sunshine heart necklace she got me for Mother’s Day every day now. She is definitely my Sunshine through all we’ve been through lately.
I also left the house briefly (with OB’s approval) to help comfort her when she had to get a dermatology procedure done to her leg. We applied a numbing cream before but it was still painful so she held me tightly the whole time. I’m so glad I could be there for her and was so proud of her for letting the doctor do the dry ice therapy to all her molloscum spots this time. Now hopefully they’ll go away in a month so she can go swim with her friends next month (even though I’m sad I won’t get to go watch her)! She got a bouncy ball as a prize that she wanted and she’s been hopping around the house on it, which is good for using up her energy! She’s been better about playing on her own, with her grandma, the neighbor or daddy but I still wish I could do more with her. I know it’s going to be different when Jax is here too, but I will do whatever I can to still give her quality time and attention. She’s always going to be my first baby and I adore her as much as she tells us she loves us. “You know who I love most? You and daddy” she says sweetly all the time. To which I respond, “I love you and daddy more than anyone too baby”. So thankful for the bond we have with her and I hope that we’ll get a chance to experience that with her baby brother Jax too! Of course we love Owen just as much though we don’t get the joy of raising him.
6/12/17
This week was good other than the bit of a worry I had over the discharge I was still having post surgery (it was not thick like a yeast infection or a lot but yellowish and had a chemical type smell so I thought it was unusual). I finally decided to just go to my general practitioner mid-week because she was closer and my OB’s office said she can conduct the same tests and provide medicine if needed. Thankfully I went in because it turned out I did not have a UTI but there were white blood cells detected in my urine which meant that I had Group B Strep in my urine (I had already been tested and told I had it in my vaginal area which can be left untreated until delivery when I would get antibiotics to make sure it wasn’t passed on to Jax). They gave me antibiotics to get rid of it since it’s potentially dangerous if found in my urine (could trigger preterm labor). I’m very thankful that I followed my instincts and kept bringing up this issue so I would be tested. God is always looking out for us and I feel that this little baby is here to stay.
I’ve been reading about life in the womb and just marveling at the fact that there is life inside of me. It’s so hard to wrap my head around that and yet such a wonderful miracle, I just want to really let that sink in.
I got to take a short break from bedrest to watch Naomi perform twice at her recital (as well as with with Josh in the dad and daughter dance. It was so cute!). She made me so proud how well she remembered her steps especially being the youngest of her group. I’m so glad I got to go and support her.
My MIL is here now helping out since my mom had to leave to go to Mexico and she’s been taking Naomi to school and back and enjoying time with her granddaughter.
I caught a cold two days ago which has been making my sleep even worse lately. I’m anxious for our appointment tomorrow, I just pray for good news and that Jax continues to be growing healthy and perfectly.
