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More Bedrest Adjustments For Our Baby’s Safety (PAL Journal: 22 Weeks)

5/30/17 (22 weeks)

Our sweet baby boy. We love your cute little face. Daddy was watching the ultrasound on FaceTime from work and the doctor kept pointing out your little winky, saying it’s a boy. Ha. I guess he thinks daddy wants you to be a boy and truthfully that makes daddy happy, but no matter your gender, daddy and I will be so thankful to have you! So glad you’re doing ok in there. Now we just need you to keep growing strong and healthy!

This week was a time of getting used to bedrest. The first week was a bit rough since I’m not used to laying around so much and having others do things for me. But now I get up a little more for a bite from the kitchen and have a bed in the office so I’m a bit more comfortable.

I stopped wearing the awfully hot and uncomfortable compression tights last week as the nurse said getting up to use the use the bathroom was enough circulation. We had dinner on Sunday for my dad and my bday and enjoyed my favorite meal, mom’s quiche.

Naomi has been struggling with me being unable to take her to and from school but I got her the Barbie with a bike she’s been wishing for because of her bravery while I was at the hospital and keep reminding her we’re doing this so baby brother can be healthy. I know it’s hard for her to have other people taking care of her and driving her to school as she’s used to me doing it, but we all are having to make sacrifices for this baby we all want so much.

This detailed schedule is what I gave my mom so she could take over with all of Naomi’s activities since I could no longer take here or pick her up. It was crazy! Thankful for my mom’s ability to fill in.

Our cerclage surgery follow up apt went great! Daddy was unable to take me as he had to work later, so we had a scary ride with mom driving us. She’s not used to van or the LA traffic!

Thankfully though the check-up on me and baby Jax went well. We saw his face a little clearer and watched him move his arm around. With another appointment behind us, I feel more hopeful that our little boy is going to be ok.

I finished crocheting his rainbow trapper beanie and a few things for the sprinkle.

Also printed out the pics of the pregnancy so far to hang on an old vintage looking door we got on FB to display at the shower. Tami also offered to give us her baby carseat and Mamaroo to use, which will save us more money on big item purchases. I feel so thankful and blessed knowing everyone loves Jax as much as us. Another week closer! 🙏🏼

Keep Growing Baby Boy! Another Week Closer To Meeting Our Rainbow (PAL Journal: 14 Weeks)

Jackson moved a lot in the womb, just like his big brother Owen. This didn’t ease my fears given that we lost Owen even after a normal, healthy pregnancy, but I tried to document every time we got to see Jax on the ultrasounds (though I was terrified and full of fear of getting bad news every single time we went in for one; such is the torture of PAL).


Feeling you move as I wait for our apt. Such a reassuring and miraculous feeling. I love you baby. I hope everything is okay. We’ll see you shortly. (Truly always trying to be positive and hopeful, though I was literally in tears by the time I got to hear his heartbeat every visit.)


I felt you move around tonight. Just a few slight rolls in the lower left side of my stomach as I watched a movie with your daddy before bedtime. It makes me so happy to feel your movements. I love you so much already baby boy!

Completed your rainbow baby set! I learned to crochet from my Abue (grandma) who always crocheted & knit items for all of the babies in the family. I haven’t tried knitting yet, but crocheting is definitely a good way for me to focus my mind on something other than what’s going on with our baby. Thankfully Pinterest & YouTube have lots of good tutorials to keep me occupied!
Daddy picked out this Jellycat calf for your first stuffy when we went out for breakfast. I thought it was perfect for you too, our little cowboy buckaroo! ? Your big sister also got a Jelly Cat stuffed animal for her first toy (a cute, scruffy dog that daddy found for her at the Grove while working at Extra).
Another pic of my growing belly taken by our sweet first daughter. Fresh out of the shower! Just wanted to make sure I don’t miss a single week with our baby boy! You never know how many you’re going to get when you’re pregnant after loss, so I didn’t know if these would be sad or happy memories in the future, but I wanted to have them either way.