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Still My Son

Pushing to end preventable stillbirth in memory of Owen Nathaniel Vick

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Oh How I Wish

on April 19, 2021November 6, 2021By Ana

I wish I knew you were in danger.

I wish I had screamed at the ER for help instead of cried.

I wish I was warned about the signs.

I wish we could have saved you.

I wish I could’ve held you alive.

I wish you were still in my arms today.

Missing you, my forever baby Owen.

Tags :#iam1in160 Infant loss mama grief pregnancy pregnancy loss stillbirth stillborn stillbornbutstillloved
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        • Though we are on the other side of the country & haven’t been able to visit Owen’s graveside, my heart is at peace/used to this being the case… My parents & family visit for us & sometimes friends will too. But also I know that our son’s body may rest in this grave, yet his soul isn’t there. 

Our boy often makes his presence known in our home & in the work we do in his memory. I think of him as our guardian angel, putting in a good word for us & helping us through tough times. God definitely takes the best. 😔 We miss Owen every day & yet we have no choice but to carry on living this life with him in our hearts till we can hold him again. 

Gracias mami y papi for fixing up Owen’s gravestone & spending time remembering him. We are sure he feels his abuelita y abuelito’s love. 🥹🥰🫂

If you’re interested in helping us save babies from stillbirth in our son’s memory, we’d appreciate you taking two minutes to go to bit.ly/StopStillbirth & bit.ly/SHINEforAutumnAct today. We really don’t want any more babies in graves that could be here if our country did more to stop this crisis! Thank you ❤️‍🩹

#stillmyson #owennathanielvick #stillborn #stillbirth #pregnancyandinfantlossawarenessmonth #birthdayinheaven  #babyloss #missingyou #ourson #pregnancy #prenatalcare
        • We’re in DC to keep pushing to pass two stillbirth bills that we know will help save countless lives & it’s already been an emotional but rewarding trip. 

Getting to see @jeffjacksonnc whom we will meet with this week & @repyoungkim who’s a #SHINEforAutumnAct lead sponsor was the highlight of the day - aside from seeing so many advocates in person that I’ve come to know & love (along with their babies)! 🥹❤️‍🩹🫂

We are only here because of the tragedy of our losses, so I feel very somber while I am also so grateful to have these warriors at our side. 

Thankfully my hubby @joshua__vick could come this time to offer a father’s perspective of this tragedy. He’s always been behind the scenes picking up my slack at home so I can push for change in Owen’s memory, but now he’s able to be here using his voice with me for our son. I’m sure we will make a difference. 💙 

More to come!

Please go to bit.ly/StopStillbirth to show your support for the bills we are hoping to pass ASAP. Thank you!

#unitedwePUSH #stillbirth #stillborn #stillbirthprevention
        • It takes a village to… save a child. We are so grateful to @healthybirthdayinc, @shineforstillbirth & all the supporting orgs of their bills for their passionate dedication of our shared mission to stop stillbirth.

We have experienced the worst tragedy, delivering our babies stillborn, & as loss parents have felt called to push to end this crisis. However, we know we cannot do it alone. We are thankful for everyone who has come before us & walks beside us as we do everything in our power to end preventable stillbirth so others will not have to suffer for a lifetime without their children like our directors & Changemakers do. 😔

Special shout out to @the2degreesfoundation, @momsrising & @marchofdimes for joining us on the hill last time to help amplify the need to pass the #SHINEforAutumnAct & #StillbirthPreventionAct! We know our voices are louder together. Thanks to everyone who advocates with us, what our country must do to protect babies from dying in the third trimester is finally starting to be heard! 🗣️🔥🔥🔥

—

Want to help?? Go to: pushpregnancy.org/legislative-advocacy & click on “Join the movement” to sign up for our newsletter. 

Bereaved parents, your baby matters! Make sure to include their name on the form so that we can honor them during our D.C. trip at our candlelight vigil. 🕯️ They are our reason for all we do! 🫂

#unitedwepush for Families. For Babies. For Change!

#stillbirth #stillborn #stillbirthawareness #stillbirthsupport #stillbirthprevention #advocatelikeamother #maternalhealth #pregnancy #paidfamilyleave #womenshealth #equalrights #birthequity #momssupportingmoms
        • Another fun date night with my love. 🥰 We’ve been making an effort to put each other first & work on our communication so that we can have an even stronger marriage.

It has been hard to always do this while raising children without a full village to support us. Our world revolved around their care + safety (especially after losing a son) & we may have taken each other for granted at times without realizing it. But the love was always there & like most parents we just needed to realize that we had to put as much work into our romance as we do into taking care of our kids. 

And yes, it helps that our youngest is finally in kindergarten full-time. We’re in a new season of life that is really exciting, but also scary in it’s own way. (Thank you past traumas!)

But as Josh reminds me, “It’s better to have loved & lost than never to have loved at all”. That quote is a wake up call for anyone afraid of getting hurt - you will be hurt regardless so you may as well give your relationship your all!

We’ve been through trials & difficult periods, but we know there’s no one else in this world we’d rather be with. I’m personally terrible with words & we’ve both had our walls up, but we’re ready to take our wonderful life & make it even more amazing. No matter what it takes.

This is my TMI story for the day because I know many couples like us have their challenges & I hope they also won’t give up when it gets hard.

My advice? Look your person in the eyes & let your walls crumble. Let them in. Tell them what you need. Be bold. I know it’s scary to be vulnerable, but it’s even worse to live a life without ever knowing how great your marriage can be. 

And for goodness’ sake, hire a babysitter (or beg a grandparent) to watch your kids & go out together! They will be fine & will learn from your example what a healthy, passionate marriage is. Putting your spouse first is crucial for a happy family life, so do it for them & yourselves!

Oh & find somewhere cute to take pics (& make out)! 😉 You’ll treasure these photos & memories for years to come.

Share your tips! 💞

#mylove #marriageadvice #romanticcouples #marriedtomybestfriend #foreveryours @joshua__vick
        • Much of #pregnancyafterloss was a scary blur. I consciously tried my best to enjoy what I could & connect with my #rainbowbaby, but it’s impossible to truly know if your dreams (like slow dancing with your child at a park) will ever come true. 

I’m not sure if I manifested or prayed Jax into existence, but I had a vision board (on Pinterest) where I kept many hopes for how he & I would be if/when he made it. Being his mom has surpassed my dreams. I didn’t get to have this mother-son relationship with his brother, so every experience we have is that much more special. Though of course he can’t replace Owen, I’m so grateful I get to have these memories with one of my boys. 

Sharing a moment my hubby remembered to capture for me that fills my heart with joy. 🥰 (Thank you my love @joshua__vick) 

Have you gone through pregnancy or parenting after loss? What’s been the most surprising part of the journey for you?
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